Year in Review – Prompt #3 Self-care

Let’s review the year that was and celebrate what we did!
Sometimes we are encouraged to dive into a vision for the new year without processing the year that has been. Have you ever experienced that?
As an art therapist and coach I know that feeling, accepting and integrating our feelings, ‘good’ and ‘bad’ is an important part of good health, and an important part of feeling authentically energised for the future.
Through the last two months of 2018 each week I’ll be sharing some end of year reflection and journaling prompts I have developed to help you integrate the experiences of this year and finish up feeling clearer and more accepting of yourself and the year that was, more focused on what you care deeply about, and more energised for the New Year.
Here is this week’s Year in Review prompt….
—–
Self-care

This week let’s celebrate self-care. Grab a blank journal and a cup of tea or glass of water and get started. the whole process will take 30-60 minutes depending on how fast you write.
Consider your ‘MEEPS’. What are MEEPS?
They are the:
MENTAL
EMOTIONAL
ENVIRONMENTAL
PHYSICAL
SOCIAL
factors that help you keep healthy and well.
M – How you cared for your mind
What did you read or listen to or discuss that stimulated your mind? What ideas really excited you this year? What topics did you learn more about? What healthy new thought patterns did you cultivate?
E – How you cared for your emotions
What difficult emotions did you make room for and feel? What emotions did you notice having more or less of this year? What emotions were hard to feel or express? Which ones were easy? What emotional support did you give yourself? How did you nurture yourself when you had strong emotions that were hard to handle?
E – How you cared for your environment
What changes did you make in your workplace or home? What new or familiar places did you go to because they feel good? What did you do to make your home feel more organised, light, welcoming or fun? What caring actions did you take for our planet, the broader environment, or community?
P – How you cared for your body
What did you do to care for your physical body this year? What small or big acts of prevention, repair or kindness did you do for your body? What healthy habits did you establish or continue? What small gestures brought pleasure, ease or comfort?
S – How you cared for your social connections
What social contact did you make this year to give yourself support, inspiration and connection? What people in your life contributed to your sense of wellbeing? What kids of social activities felt especially nourishing?
Pause, breathe and celebrate all these things and more that you’ve done for your wellbeing this year.
#selfcare #yearinreview #reflections #newyear

Not every day is sunny

I have thought of giving up more than once, probably more than 30 (million) times on my ‘entrepreneurial journey’. The last time was briefly just last month. When I feel like that here are some variations of is what might go through my head to trigger or compound the thought – one of these is usually really loud when I fall into feeling hopeless:

  • ‘I’ve taken on way too much, I’ll never get it all done, this feels awful, run away!’
  • ‘I obviously have deep mindset issues that are holding me back, I’ll never get rid of them, there’s no point trying’.
  • ‘It’s not fair, look at them, they’re doing so well and I’m not’
  • ‘Oh my gosh I’ve squandered all my talents and experience and managed to make nothing out of it’
  • ‘I am overwhelmed by all the courses and coaches and training and I don’t trust that any of them will actually help me, I feel overwhelmed by all I need to learn and resistant to get started’.

Had any of those? Or similar ones? Yes me too.

I’m sick of ‘successful’ people who sell a carefully constructed two dimensional version of ‘success’ – some fantasy land where self doubt is entirely banished, every day is sparkles and rainbows and life looks like an instagrammed smoothie. I’m sick of it because in many cases it is just a calculating move to sell more things (I want what she’s having!) but worse than that, because it contributes to an expectation that this is how life ‘should’ feel (or look).

This expectation is suffocating.

I mean, seriously, it’s the human condition people. There will be laughter and tears, snot and baby poo, death, illness, dirt under the fingers. There will be wrinkles. There will be crumbs. There will be things that become tattered and frayed and some days we will feel a bit like that too. There will be ugly crying and hard things. No matter how gorgeous your bronzed bod looks twisting in its white one piece swimsuit at the beach at dawn one day (if you are lucky enough to live that long) you will get old and wrinkly. Lots more stuff than your snapchat filter can rub away.

Some days you might feel lazy, or grumpy, or catty, or incompetant, or just plain old scared. Yup. That’s going to happen. You might not like what comes out of your mouth or the thoughts you’re having. You might wonder ‘who is this angry b*tch who’s taken up residence in my head?’

Personally when I feel like giving up I need to stamp my feet and howl and write in my journal and cry real tears. I need to make big cranky art. I need to feel despair, real despair, and I need to cradle it like a precious thing. I need to complain to a friend or a coach or a mentor, someone kind who will listen while the storm rolls itself through.

I need to be petty and voice my crotchety annoyances. I need to imagine stepping away, imagine a big fat NO to all my projects.

And then gently I return to hope.

(And when I’m back to hope everything feels possible, doable, sparkly and fun.)

And despite all this, in and amongst it, I can still get things done.

If you wait until that perfect day when you are the thin, groomed, sunny, effortless, confident, multitasking, knowledgeable, wholly in your power version of you before you do anything you may never move.

Maybe we are actually birthing that version of ourselves, all of us, in every day that we cradle ourselves with kindness and allow the feelings out. Maybe the imperfect actions and acting without knowing all of what we are doing is what shapes and creates us.

If you want to work with someone who can help you get started on your dream project NOW – with all your wonderful flaws and quirks and inexperience and bad moods and self doubt, then look me up. We might just get along like a house on fire. And I promise I’ll forgive you your flaws if you forgive me mine.