It’s a beautiful coat but it’s not my coat

Have you ever done that thing? At a party or at the end of a dinner out, you make the grab, and sling a dark coat over your arm. In all the saying of goodbye’s and finding of handbags, phone and maybe fishing out of keys it’s just one more task to do. Mwah mwah, you have cheeks to kiss and books to promise to lend, and last jokes to make or hugs to give.

But then as you step out into the cold of the street and the sensory overload fades you realise that your hand is registering something. That coat, that fabric, it’s unfamiliar. You look down and see an imposter. YOUR coat wasn’t dark blue felted wool, YOUR coat was a deep charcoal thick cotton trench coat, kind of soft, not as furry.

Now let’s be clear, the coat you’re holding is gorgeous. You hold it up in the light and see just how stylish it is, the weight of the cloth, the sparkle of the button, the ever so faint sweet waft of perfume rubbed into the collar. But it’s not your coat.

The fit of the shoulders won’t be the same, the lint in the pockets would be someone else’s creepy lint not your familiar bit of tissue and pen lid. You won’t have memories of when you first saw it, or when you wore it to special occasions. Make no mistake, this is not your coat.

Dreams are like this too. We can accidentally pick up the wrong dream, and find out later that we have been carrying around a dream that doesn’t quite fit.

And just like the coat, the right thing to do is to give it back and go get your own.



7 thoughts on “It’s a beautiful coat but it’s not my coat”

  1. I once was frantic because my coat disappeared at a Christmas party and it was my Mum’s old coat that I inherited when she died -Navy Cashmere with all those memories – there was a dark cashmere coat but it was grey and a Mans cut – my son came charging up the stairs wearing Mums coat – looking very worried he he he

  2. What a lovely metaphor.

    To be carried away by a sparkling dream can happen so easily.
    Thanks for reminding us to stay true to ourselves. Even if our wish is not as shiny as the next person’s.

  3. This is what I call an off-the-rack or off-the-peg life – one that fits most, but might not fit you. I would like to create what I call a custom-tailored life – something made to fit my personality’s curves and idiosyncrasies. The challenge of creating a custom-tailored life is making peace with being misunderstood.

    1. Yes! Custom-tailored…exactly. Making peace with being misunderstood can certainly be part of that journey. For me it’s also involving daring to go inwards to figure out what I really love and am good at versus what I think I ‘should’ or ‘could’ do.

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